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December 20, 2010 by Spreading Joy

How I see YOU

[Translate]

 

look past the surface

I love speaking to ladies groups, kids and just encouraging others.  We all need less stress and more Joy for our Journey and I’m honored to be able to come and encourage any group!

I recently had the privilege of speaking to some wonderful ladies that have been or are in a local Battered Women’s shelter.  I spent the week thinking about some of what they may have endured, what they probably tried to do for them, their children and to bring peace to their home and focused on how those events made me see them.

Here is how I see these ladies.

YOU ARE:

BEAUTIFUL – Your beauty comes from deep within.  Nothing or no one can ever destroy it.  When you gaze into the mirror, look past the surface, go deeper….deeper still.  That beauty that is deep within you is ready to bubble up and gush out!  Let it bubble up and out freely.  Our physical beauty is limited, but the beauty that is deep within our soul outshines and out lasts the physical and has a positive effect on all of those around us! YOU are beautiful!

COURAGEOUS – Yes, YOU!  You lived in fear, you live with fear and have many fearful moments ahead of you, but look back with me a moment.  Look at how far you’ve come.  The courage you’ve shown to get out of the abusive situation and into something better is nothing short of amazing.  You’ll continue to move past the fears, move past the doubts and other horrors you face daily that will try and hold you back.  Your heart may tremble, your hands shake but you won’t let that stop you.  You can do this as YOU are courageous!

STRONG – You are strong! You’ve endured abuse that others can’t possibly imagine, and that takes strength.  You’ve tried to fix things, make things better and be the right kind of gal but that was never the issue.  You then stepped out, with children in tow and are working towards a better future. The strength it takes to be a single mom, to ease their fears, to show them what is right and good is unbelievable.  You are strong, you fight through difficulties, you fight to survive and you’ll push past the barriers that try and hold you down.  You will make it! YOU are strong!

WISE – Yes, I said wise!  Don’t sell yourself short.  We all make mistakes, we all make decisions that we wish we could take back and moments we wish we could order up a “do-over”!  Look at you! You are moving forward, learning and making things better. You are doing the right things right now! Don’t look back at the mistakes, unless you are choosing to grow and learn from them!  Hear me….YOU are wise.

CARING – You have amazing hearts!  You care so much.  That’s why you tried to work things out, why you sacrifice for your children, that’s why you are the wonderful person that you are.  Your heart is huge for others and you want to make a difference and believe me you DO!  YOU are caring!

PERSISTENT – You put one foot in front of the other each and every day.  I’m sure there are days where you feel like throwing up your hands and saying “what is the use”, but you move forward anyway.  You grow tired from the struggle, but you get out of bed and face the day.  You wonder about tomorrow, next month and next year, but you keep looking, hoping and knowing that the future is there, waiting on you to grab it up with both arms, embracing all the wonderful things that are waiting you.  You keep trying, learning and going! You push yourselves as well as push your children! YOU are persistent.

IMPORTANT – YES – YOU!!!  You make a difference every day!  You bring smiles, warm hearts with big hugs. You encourage, motivate and teach.  You give hope to little eyes that wonder about a million things a day and love to hearts that need it.  You are important to today and the next generation.  The great things that you are doing today, will have a huge impact on tomorrow and the future.  YOU are important.

CAPABLE – YOU can do this!  It is so easy to look and see the negative, see where we feel like we have failed and think we just can’t do it.  We don’t have to teach our children to see the negative, but we do have to teach them to see the positive, do what is right and look for opportunities to make a difference.  Use those negative things that creep into your mind, trying to make you feel horrible to remind yourself that you’ve learned from that. You’ve come a long way from that point and you are not going back, simply because you don’t have to.  Use the past to remind yourself that you are capable of moving forward, doing whatever it is you set your mind on doing.  YOU are capable.

ADAPTIVE – This is so important and you excel at it!  Think with me for a moment.  You knew when you had to keep the kids quiet, when you could let loose and enjoy the laughter in your hearts. You knew when “he” was home that certain things had to be done a certain way and you adapted.  When he wasn’t around, you lived, loved, laughed and adapted to that as well.  This is a priceless ability for when the storms of life are raining down on you.  This ability will serve you for years to come as you face the mountains in your way and your initial thought is for the mountain to “swallow me up, I can’t face you.”  You will adapt time and time again! YOU are adaptive.

SENSITIVE – Your hearts are tender and it grows stronger every day.  You’ve seen situations that many have not had to see, much less endure.  This has made you even more sensitive than most.  You can see the sadness in the eyes of a child quicker than most and know how to turn that frown upside down. You can see the loneliness oozing from the hearts of others and know that a simple hug and smile will help to ease that pain.  Because of this sensitivity, you have an opportunity to make dark days brighter; you have the chance to be the light at the end of the tunnel.  You can shine brighter than you ever thought possible.  YOU are sensitive.

SPECTACULAR – YOU are beyond awesome!  You have a huge heart, a loving spirit and the willingness to fight through whatever comes your way. You don’t ask for much, yet are willing to give all for your child.  You will take lesser portions, step in front of physical harm and remind your child that tenderness will get you further than being demanding and hateful.  You amaze me at the courage, strength and abilities you have to make it through each day. YOU are spectacular.

These attributes are evident in all of us if we look deep enough.  We tend to stop just short of the surface because that is what society is teaching us to do.  We need to look past the surface.  We need to look at the things that matter, which is far more than physical features.

It is my desire that as you step into a new day that you’ll be more aware of these wonderful qualities about you. 

I hope that you’ll focus on the positive and grow from the negative.

As you look at yourself, I hope that you’ll see all of these wonderful things in a wonderful new light this year – and always.

{{HUGS}} yall

 

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Comments

  1. 1

    Denisa Grimm says

    December 21, 2010 at 9:13 am

    Good Morning! WOW..as you know, my friends & I recently made over 320 bags for women & children to receive when they get to the shelter.These bags contained a few “personal care” items that NOBODY should EVER have to share with anyone,let alone strangers, such as soap,a washcloth,toothbrush & paste deodorant,socks…even some candy & gum. I wish I could have included these WONDERFUL,INSPIRING words that you just wrote on a piece of paper so these women who were SO BRAVE to take that first step could read over & over to assure themselves that they did the RIGHT thing by taking that Very Scary first step into a better life for themselves and their children. So with your permission, I would LOVE to print out your INSPIRATIONAL words and include it in future bags. The very best Christmas gift I got this year was the JOY and Peace I have felt helping other people, and also seeing my close friends experiencing True Giving of their hearts! Spreading Joy is INFECTIOUS and FUN too! MERRY CHRISTMAS and Thank You from the bottom of my Overwhelmed Heart……..

    Reply
    • 2

      Marie says

      December 21, 2010 at 10:06 am

      Denisa,

      I would be honored if you would include this in your future goody bags!! Wow! talk about infectious!! You inspire me so much and encourage me. I can feel your excitement here and on twitter!!

      I’m so honored to watch you make a difference to so many people! AND knowing that its GROWING!! Wow…you are flooding so many peoples hearts with great joy!!

      Thank you for how you encourage me!!

      {{{HUGS}}} – Merry Christmas!!

      @spreadingJOY
      Marie recently posted..How I see YOU

      Reply
  2. 3

    Elizabeth G. says

    December 21, 2010 at 8:41 pm

    Thank you so much for sharing this Marie and your understanding and kind words .. I try very hard to spread caring , blessings , smiles , and hugs on twitter ..Something they brings me great Joy and love when others say it brightens their day .

    And YOU as well as others you are aware of on twitter helped me to awaken my courage and move out and realize I desired better . And I will never ever forget that . Feel Blessed everyday ..

    Reply
    • 4

      Spreading Joy says

      December 22, 2010 at 7:11 pm

      I LOVE how beautiful you are and courageous you are!! I remember the struggle, the quietness and now to see you float through the day, encouraging, bringing smiles and making a difference every single way you can is a true testament of the strength and courage you have deep within you.

      thank you for how you brighten my day Elizabeth! For how you are a shining light that reminds others that they too deserve better!!

      {{HUGS}}
      @spreadingJOY

      Reply
  3. 5

    Marion Youngblood says

    December 22, 2010 at 8:12 am

    Your words are truly wonderful and so very true! There is so much beauty and power in each of us and we often don’t see it because we’re covered with pain and the inappropriate definitions other people have put on us.

    Your uplifting words are so valuable and I pledge to do my part to help spread the word that we are all incredible.

    Thanks for your compassionate voice!

    Reply
    • 6

      Spreading Joy says

      December 22, 2010 at 7:08 pm

      WHAHOOO!!! see, how wonderful are YOU?? Encouraging others and reminding them of just how wonderful they are is a glorious gift to those people!! We are often covered by pain, grief, guilt and such that we can’t see the good that is covering us as well.

      And…yes, many do define themselves by the definitions that others have placed on them. We’ve got to move past that!!

      Thank you soo much for reminding us NOT to define ourselves that way!

      {{HUGS}}
      @spreadingJOY

      Reply
  4. 7

    Rose says

    December 22, 2010 at 8:31 am

    The fear of man brings a snare,
    But whoever trusts in the LORD shall be safe. – Proverbs 29:25

    You made the point with your statement “We tend to stop just short of the surface because that is what society is teaching us to do.”

    This ultimately can be traced back to us putting much too much emphasis on the opinion of man over the opinion of our God…of how we are to Him…and we are BEAUTIFUL! Afterall, we were made in His image!! We just need to turn back to Him and embrace His thoughts about us which are all GOOD! 🙂

    Reply
    • 8

      Spreading Joy says

      December 22, 2010 at 7:06 pm

      I LOOOVE that we are fearfully and wonderfully made!! along with the fact that the LORD KNOWS us and yet, still…HE chooses us!!

      Thank you for the wonderful verse and reminder that we ARE made in HIS image!! xoxoxox

      {{HUGS}}
      @spreadingJOY

      Reply
  5. 9

    Jerry Waddell says

    December 27, 2010 at 8:39 am

    Hi Marie,
    This really hits close to home. You see, my wonderful and amazing wife had been in 3 abusive relationships before God brought us together. She was helped immensely through the ministry of Friendship Home in Lincoln, NE (www.friendshiphome.org) I believe her heart for helping others came about partially due to how she was helped in her time of great need! It is awesome what God can do through those who are willing to be used as his vessels and messengers! Thanks again!

    Reply
    • 10

      Marie says

      December 28, 2010 at 9:15 am

      Jerry,

      I love how our past helps to make our future even brighter than ever. A wonderful friend of mine @mcProdigal always always says that our past perfectly prepares us for our future – and you’ve reminded us of that. It will be wonderfully amazing what these ladies will do to help others.

      big {{HUGS}} – i’m thankful for you Jerry!!

      @spreadingJOY
      Marie recently posted..30 Day Challenge Jan 2011

      Reply
  6. 11

    jadarosa (Elena Haupricht) says

    February 1, 2011 at 1:18 pm

    Thanx!! for touching so many lives of people who are hurting, broken and lost their hope..sometimes it doe’t take a lot but it’s more than anyone will ever know in a BIG way!! God Bless

    Reply
  7. 12

    Nisha says

    February 2, 2015 at 11:37 am

    Beautiful
    Nisha recently posted..Day 1603: All of Me – Cover by the Determined Madison Tevlin

    Reply
  8. 13

    Melanie says

    July 20, 2015 at 11:25 am

    Thank your for these words.
    Melanie recently posted..{Currently} Counting Down To Homeschool

    Reply
  9. 14

    andi says

    July 20, 2015 at 12:28 pm

    beautiful – simply beautiful 😀
    andi recently posted..Today, You Can Save Over $8 When Shopping!

    Reply
  10. 15

    Mary Collins says

    July 20, 2015 at 12:54 pm

    What a wonderful pick-me-up for a Monday. I needed this.
    Mary Collins recently posted..Marvelous Mondays for Free Books–July 20, 2015

    Reply
  11. 16

    Brandi @ penguinsinpink.com says

    July 20, 2015 at 7:44 pm

    This is so great, Marie! I often get distracted by the world and have to remind myself who I am in Christ. I needed to read this today.
    Brandi @ penguinsinpink.com recently posted..Thoughts on Anchored: Finding Hope in the Unexpected

    Reply
  12. 17

    Melanie Pickett, Flying Blonde says

    July 20, 2015 at 9:02 pm

    These are beautiful, encouraging words. I write about abuse and self-worth issues and how they usually go hand-in-hand. These are reminders of how we need to view ourselves. If only everyone believed these things about themselves.
    Melanie Pickett, Flying Blonde recently posted..To Win Her Favor

    Reply
  13. 18

    Jelli says

    July 20, 2015 at 10:03 pm

    You’re such an encourager, Marie. I can see why you’re asked to speak to groups of women!
    Jelli recently posted..9 Proven Ways to Save Money on Newborn Essentials

    Reply
  14. 19

    Jennifer DeFrates/Heaven Not Harvard says

    July 20, 2015 at 11:28 pm

    There are lots of times I struggle with being beautiful. But this week, covered in sunblock and sand, with my hair twisted in clips and ties to keep it “tamed” my husband saw me, and liked what he saw. He said because it was real. I still struggle with the world’s definitions of beauty, but I’m learning to be more and more beautiful on the inside through my relationship with God.
    Jennifer DeFrates/Heaven Not Harvard recently posted..Christians Can’t Swear

    Reply
  15. 20

    Jonathan Key says

    July 20, 2015 at 11:42 pm

    This hit home. Even as a guy. This is such an encouraging article. I’m going to share this with my family. Thank you for putting this into words. Such wonderful reminders. God bless you!
    Jonathan Key recently posted..The No Spend Challenge – Day 20: Clean the Kids’ Room(s)

    Reply
  16. 21

    Deborah says

    July 20, 2015 at 11:56 pm

    Thank you for these words of encouragement. It takes a godly woman to see the beauty in all the others!
    Blessings,
    Deborah recently posted..When His Words Hurt

    Reply
  17. 22

    GinaB @ Mirror Watching says

    July 21, 2015 at 6:47 am

    Great post on the need to look beyond the surface. Life in God and strength in family and community is all about connection. Your post is a great reminder of that.
    GinaB @ Mirror Watching recently posted..My Lifestyle Change Is Changing My Life

    Reply
  18. 23

    Marina says

    July 22, 2015 at 6:19 am

    As a Mom, unless I see beauty in me and love the person God made me to be, my kids will grow up feeling awkward around their beings. I love this post!
    Marina recently posted..Life lessons from Gifted Hands: The Ben Carson Story

    Reply
  19. 24

    Victoria @ Creative Home Keeper says

    July 22, 2015 at 11:06 am

    Your words were just the inspiration I need to read this morning! Thank you for sharing!
    Victoria @ Creative Home Keeper recently posted..The Sanity Saving Tactic of Keeping a Bible Book Basket

    Reply
  20. 25

    Pamela says

    August 13, 2015 at 3:36 pm

    This is one I had to print out for my daughters. They tease me because I used “Pretty is and pretty does.” But they’ve both thanked me for putting the emphasis on the inside. We always need reminded of it once in a while. What a beautiful gift to give to the hurting women in the shelter. Encouragement they can hold in their hearts.
    Pamela recently posted..Prayers Around the World

    Reply
  21. 26

    Matilda says

    August 14, 2015 at 3:52 am

    These are really great attributes that we unfortunately tend tend to gloss over. Our society is more about looks these days ignoring the beautiful virtues that lie within. This is a great reminder on the things that matter…

    Reply
  22. 27

    Cathy says

    August 16, 2015 at 9:06 am

    I love this list, it’s a great list to live up to and aspire to! 🙂
    Cathy

    Reply
  23. 28

    Angie B. says

    November 16, 2015 at 12:35 am

    Beautiful post!!! #BloggerCareGroup

    Reply

Trackbacks

  1. Christmas JOY – The Celebration | Spreading Joy says:
    January 31, 2013 at 3:00 am

    […] part of my Christmas!  I have been thinking about them all week and take a few minutes to tell them the wonderful attributes I see in them.  I give them instructions as to where to find the toys, the gift wrapping stations and such.  I […]

    Reply

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